C’mon we’ve heard many of these stories before. Maria Sharapova, famous Russian tennis player,getting a 15-month ban because of taking performance enhancing drugs (although it was for her heart condition). Or do you remember Ross Rebagliati,the famous snowboarder who almost lost a win because of coming out positive for marijuana in the 1998OlympicGames.Seehttps://ca.sports.yahoo.com/news/ross-rebagliati-tells-story-20-years-olympic-controversy-142458825.html
Any of these personalities ring a bell?
I’m sure they do. After all, you wouldn’t be in this article if:
- You’re not an athlete. (I specifically mentioned this article is for people who’re building their athletic career)
- You’re 100% clean from any type of “questionable” substance.
- You don’t have an impending drug test coming up anytime soon.
Did I hit the jackpot? Well, don’t worry. You are in good hands today.
I want to tell you that the best way to get past drug test is to stay clear of any performance enhancing drugs, but I unfortunately cannot. That is because it would be downright hypocrisy coming from me who is (1) an ex-athlete and (2) has a history of drug use. I mean, I get it. I know what it’s like to be young, feel adventurous, and regret your stupid actions later on. It’s all a part of life.
And by the way, I’m a retired athlete. I was never kicked out of the team because I was high on ‘shrooms. Just in case you’re wondering.
Going back, just because you’re an athlete doesn’t make you invulnerable to life’s trickiest temptations. So instead of crying your eyes out because of an impending drug test, I’m here to suggest one of the most viable solutions to your problem. Trust me; this method is so effective I sure wish it was available during my time – especially when you’re on the big MJ.
Tell me one surefire way you know that can help you rid tetrahydrocannabinol out of your system. I’m pretty sure you’re thinking of fake pee or synthetic urine products from Test Clear just now. Well, although these methods are “fairly” effective (or will at least get you out of the rut), still they will only work if the test is a URINE test – the most common method of catching weed smokers out there if I say so myself.
Let me tell you something: Do not underestimate the authorities.
Urine tests are the oldest trick in the book. Do you think that they will just keep on using it again and again even when it is already “internet knowledge” that there are many ways to fake the results of a urine test? No siree. Your prosecutors may not be as obsolete as you think they are.
One thing they may try is the hair follicle test.
And unfortunately, with this test, no amount of fake pee can save you. Using the latest technology, they can now extract the residues of toxic – oftentimes illegal – substances in the cortex of your hair follicle. Yikes! You have to give it to them for going the extra mile just to catch a rule breaker like you. If anything, I’d say that takes a whole lot of dedication.
So now, I present you with two possible solutions to your problem:
- Wax your head clean and make it hard for them to even search for a single follicle. (They just might reconsider giving you the urine tests if you’re lucky enough. Then, you can use your store-bought fake pee)
- Use detox shampoo.
I don’t know if I’m just assuming this but I think you’d go with the detox option – not that, it wouldn’t amuse me to see your clean-shaved head. Anyway, you heard it right. There is in fact a detoxifying shampoo in existence that can help you flush out the THC toxins on your hair follicles. I even took the liberty of searching for a nice website for you (http://aloeridshampoo.com/). Here, you can read everything you need to know about detoxifying your hair. It smells pretty nice too!
Luckily, with the innovations of today, you won’t be sporting the bald look anytime soon (darn it!). And you may even retain your jock status way beyond college using this new technology’s revolutionary help!
Preach.
